Sunday Feb 24, 2008
Because sex involves interaction with other human beings, it will come as no surprise that we don't always treat one another well in bed.

Human beings are assailed by bad habits and selfish behavior in every area of life. When it comes to sex, sometimes we just get lazy.

Do you recognize yourself below? If so, you may be sexually lazy.

The Me, Me, Me Lover

Sometimes it can be exciting when one person kicks back and lets another give them pleasure. But all the time? If one partner dominates in a relationship, the temptation might be to dominate in bed as well, calling the shots and determining every move.  Whatever form it takes, sex is a two-way street where both participants need to decide what is going to be served on the "love menu" on any particular night.

The Only On Saturday Lover

I think there are many benefits to keeping a regular schedule but it can also lead to a stale love life. The danger for many busy people is that the weekend is the only time they indulge in personal pleasure.

Sex can become relegated to Saturday night in the way that laundry is saved for Sunday afternoon. Whenever sex happens, it should not be a chore. Try changing up the sex schedule to break your routine.

The Wait For It Lover

It would be wonderful if we could read one another's minds in a relationship and know the perfect moment for sex. But, generally, one person needs to instigate romance, and it is easy for that task to always fall on the same person.

It is much fairer, and more exciting, if both partners in a relationship initiate sex from time to time. Aside from fairness, more equality in this area helps to create variety, as we all have different times and places we find exciting.

The Not In The Mood Lover

Sexual excitement doesn't always just happen. If we wait until we are fully revved-up to initiate sex in a relationship, it may never happen. 

There are a variety of ways to help your partner become excited or to get turned-on yourself.  But if we shut down the possibility of sex unless our mood is perfect, we lose the opportunity for real interaction in our relationships. Not in the mood?  Maybe you will be in 15 minutes if you give it a try!

Sex is a wonderful gift that can help us stay physically, emotionally, and spiritually healthy. But like all health matters, sex requires work. So don't be a lazy lover.